The column that follows is about anal sex.
Some friends have urged me against writing it, not because
readers find frank discussions of anal sex "icky," but because the
offending comments' source-Peter LaBarbera-is unworthy of serious
attention.
In one sense these friends are quite right. But for reasons I
hope to make clear, LaBarbera's most recent ugliness needs
answering.
LaBarbera is the president of Americans for Truth About
Homosexuality (AFTAH), one of the nastier anti-gay groups. In a
recent letter at his website, he discusses how Matt Barber at
Liberty Counsel (a right-wing legal group) is threatening to
boycott the Conservative Political Action Conference unless CPAC
drops the gay conservative group GOProud as a co-sponsor.
LaBarbera writes, "It boils down to this: there is nothing
'conservative' about - as Barber inimitably puts it - 'one man
violently cramming his penis into another man's lower intestine and
calling it love'."
Don't say I didn't warn you.
LaBarbera's post led Liberty Counsel to deny that Barber had
ever said such a nasty thing, prompting a sharp rebuttal from
LaBarbera, followed by Barber's admission that he had indeed made
the comment privately years ago (and had given LaBarbera permission
to quote it). This back-and-forth was interspersed with some barbs
between LaBarbera and Randy Thomas, executive VP of the ex-gay
group Exodus International, at Thomas's Exodus blog. (Thanks to
Pam's House Blend for exposing the imbroglio.)
I'll focus here on LaBarbera, since he was the one who saw fit
recently to post Barber's words and to defend them repeatedly,
calling them "a brutally honest and necessarily accurate
description of homosexual sodomy." He also challenged Thomas to
"cite chapter and verse in the Bible" explaining why their use of
these words is wrong.
Chapter and verse? Let me try.
Exodus 20:16: "Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy
neighbor." (Hint: it's one of the Ten Commandments, and it boils
down simply to "Don't lie.")
Look, Peter-and I know you're reading this-NOBODY calls it love
when a man "violently cram[s] his penis into another man's lower
intestine." Nobody.
We sane people call that rape.
Indeed, the "violent cramming" of a penis into any bodily
orifice, male or female, is rape. Not love. The description is not
merely uncharitable (about which we could both cite many verses),
it's a blatant falsehood.
Frankly, I'm not surprised you missed this simple, obvious
point, because when it comes to homosexuality, you wouldn't know
truth if it violently crammed itself into your-oh, never mind.
Now one might argue that we shouldn't bother with LaBarbera.
Indeed, a Christian friend of mine told me just that, stating that
LaBarbera's comments are "no more worth writing about than the
graffiti on men's room walls."
And I wish I could ignore them. I really, really do. If only the
sentiments underlying them weren't so pervasive and harmful.
I've been defending gays and lesbians against heterosexist
distortions for two decades. And one of the things that has
saddened and angered me most is our opponents' continued tendency
to reduce our lives, our commitments, and our intimacy to bare
mechanical descriptions-and false ones at that.
Why do they do this? Perhaps it's because of a fundamental lack
of empathy (a trait that forms the core of The Golden Rule, another
biblical principle).
Or perhaps it's because they know that dehumanizing us in this
way is an extremely effective tactic. As LaBarbera himself writes
at the Exodus blog, his and Barber's "colorful and dismissive"
language are precisely geared to "re-stigmatize shameful homosexual
behavior."
Stigmatize, it surely does.
By spreading their lies about "violent cramming" and such,
LaBarbera, Barber and their ilk have visited needless suffering
upon countless LGBT people, particularly LGBT youth.
Among the unspoken casualties of such stigmatization is that it
makes it harder for us to have frank conversations about the
relative risks of various sexual practices, for fear of feeding
such nastiness. The upshot is more silence, and shame,
and-paradoxically-risk.
All of which LaBarbera and Barber can answer to their Maker for,
when and if Judgment Day should come. "Inasmuch as ye have done it
unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto
me" (Matthew 25:40).