Even at CPAC…

California Young Americans for Freedom (YAF) leader Ryan Sorba was booed at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) when he said CPAC shouldn't have allowed the gay group GOProud [a coalition of gay Republicans] to be there. Here's the YouTube:

Alexander McCobin of Students for Liberty provoked Sorba's comments by saying in his own short speech:

"In the name of freedom, I would like to thank the American Conservative Union for welcoming GOProud as a co-sponsor of this event, not for any political reason but for the message it sends….Students today recognize that freedom does not come in pieces. Freedom is a single thing that applies to the social as well as the economic realms and should be defended at all times."

McCobin also drew some boos, but they were drowned out by applause. CPAC is the largest annual gathering of the hard-right wing of the Republican party. This represents progress.

After the GOP makes expected big congressional gains this coming November, lobbying within the libertarian wing of the Republican party will be vitally important. But don't count on the big-name "progressive" LGBT groups to bother with anything remotely like constructive engagement.

The Judge is Gay. So What?

U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker is gay.

Which means that the Proposition 8 case will be decided by someone it directly affects - that is, someone who can't get married under the current law.

The question of the week, of course, is: Is this fair?

A ferocious debate about this is raging in the press and the blogosphere. On one side is the National Organization for Marriage, the conservative, anti-gay marriage organization that has been fighting Prop 8 all along.

They immediately sent out a letter that read, in part: "[Judge Walker has] been an amazingly biased and one-sided force throughout this trial, far more akin to an activist than a neutral referee."

This is ridiculous on its face. For one thing, a REALLY biased (for us) judge would have immediately issued a stay on Prop 8, allowing gay weddings to continue while the case was decided.

The truth is that the National Organization for Marriage would have called Walker an "activist judge" if he ruled against Proposition 8, no matter his sexual orientation. And odds are that we will win this case in Walker's court - simply because the anti-marriage folks presented a very weak (to non-existent) case.

On the other side are the gay blogs, many of which responded with surprise, secret joy and immediate fear about what the right would say. It almost goes without saying that the gay community thinks that Walker being gay is positive news for us.

But why would it be?

Though Walker lives in the liberal San Francisco metro area, he was appointed by the first President George Bush and is a proponent of law and economics, the more conservative/libertarian branch of law that grew out of the fairly conservative University of Chicago law school. He has been a judge for over 20 years without the issue of pro-gay bias coming up.

In fact, gay activists have previously cried foul over his actions. The San Francisco Chronicle reported (in the column that outed Walker's "open secret" to the country) that Walker once "represented the U.S. Olympic Committee in a successful bid to keep San Francisco's Gay Olympics from infringing on its name," leading gay Californians to "hold him in contempt."

But there is a broader issue here that extends beyond Judge Walker: Why are minority identities assumed to be biased in and of themselves?

After all, no one assumes that mainstream identities lead to bias. If a straight judge had won the draw for the Proposition 8 case, no one would automatically assume that he would uphold an anti-gay marriage law.

On the other hand, if he had espoused another minority identity like being Mormon, I bet you that gays and lesbians would have cried foul - even though there are plenty of Mormons who support gay marriage.

This issue comes up over and over again in American jurisprudence. People wonder if African-American judges will fairly rule on issues like affirmative action. They wonder if women judges will be objective when faced with gender discrimination cases.

And so of course they wonder - we all wonder - if Judge Walker feels and thinks differently about the Proposition 8 case because he's gay.

It comes up, of course, because judges are human. They can't help being swayed by their full identities and experiences, whoever they are. Sometimes being a minority makes them more sympathetic to the minority plight. Sometimes being a minority makes them LESS sympathetic, partly because they are worried that they, yes, will be seen as biased.

Being expected to think a certain way just because of your gender/ethnic/religious/sexual identity is insulting.

Democracy is messy. People have all sorts of secret feelings, all varieties of life experience, that can't be captured in simple Democrat/Republican, straight/gay labels. Judges are trained to overcome these as much as they can, but of course they will be swayed by them.

Which way will they be swayed? We can't predict. And that's why identities are not biases.

Gays and Conservatives: The Cato Forum

The libertarian Cato Institute today hosted a forum on the topic "Is There a Place for Gay People in Conservatism and Conservative Politics?," featuring Nick Herbert, MP, the British Conservative Party's openly gay Shadow Secretary of State for Environment, Food, and Rural Affairs. Responses to Herbert's remarks (an affirmative reply to the above question) were provided by Andrew Sullivan, a supporter of President Obama who detests the Republican party, and anti-gay activist Maggie Gallagher, who opposes any conservatism that might grant gay people the freedom to legally marry and thus equal liberty under the law.

Rick Sincere has blogged a richly detailed account, which I highly recommend. It's well worth reading.

More. I see that over at Positive Liberty, Jason Kuznicki also has blogged his views of the event (as a libertarian, he's skeptical of the proposition). While Dan Blatt at the proudly conservative and pro-Republican Gay Patriot site takes umbrage at the absence of an actual gay American conservative on the panel.

Nowheresville

If the goal of those opposing same-sex marriage is to keep us from getting married, or having our relationships legally recognized, or "destroying" marriage, you might think they'd be happy enough to see our relationships formally dissolved.

But that's clearly not the case. The most recent example of an eager politician deploying gay equality as a strategy rather than an issue is Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott, who wants to prevent a lesbian couple legally married in Massachusetts from getting a divorce in his state.

It's easy to simply scoff at this story, but it's enormously important. It's not just marriage our opponents are out to deny us - it's any acknowledgement in the law that our relationships exist. Even the legal mechanism for undoing our marriages is too much legal recognition for them.

What they want is for us to return to the closet.

It is our invisibility they desire. They can no longer plausibly claim we don't exist at all, but they'll be damned if they'll allow the law to include us either explicitly or even implicitly. Better a married gay couple than a divorced one, if it means permitting a gay couple to invoke the law of divorce.

Those of us who are old enough grew up in that netherworld where the law simply had nothing to say about us, and everyone was allowed to live in denial about our existence. We had to fend for ourselves, literally outside the law.

We will not return to those days, and neither will anyone else. Our existence in the law is now firmly enough established - even if it's to deny us marriage under state constitutions - that the closet is no longer an option, for us or for the rest of the country.

Yet that is what a Texas politician is trying to do, leave a same-sex couple in the legal oblivion that he thinks should be their fate.

Refining—Not Redefining

Since my recent column discussing the "definitional argument" against marriage equality, I've learned something unsurprising:

There is no single, standard "definitional argument." There are, rather, various definitional arguments, and part of the problem is pinning down which one our opponents intend.

In the hope of advancing the debate-or at least of showing that the moving target is indeed moving-I'd like to distinguish, and briefly respond to, four versions. I'll give them names for convenience:

1. The "Logical Impossibility" Version:

This, in some ways, is the purest definitional argument against same-sex marriage. It is also the silliest. Here's Alliance Defense Fund attorney Jeffery Ventrella:

"[T]o advocate same-sex 'marriage' is logically equivalent to seeking to draw a 'square circle': One may passionately and sincerely persist in pining about square circles, but the fact of the matter is, one will never be able to actually draw one."

And again,

"The public square has no room for square circles, because like the Tooth Fairy, they do not really exist."

Notice that people don't normally bother arguing against square circles or passing constitutional amendments banning them, precisely because they do not-and cannot-exist.

Are same-sex marriages similar? Surely SOMETHING exists that people refer to as "same-sex marriage," and the question at hand is whether they should persist in doing so. Ventrella's "square circles" argument doesn't answer that question: it begs it.

In other words, Ventrella is assuming what he's supposed to be proving.

2. The "Obscuring Differences" Version:

This version, which is related to the first, states that same-sex relationships and opposite-sex relationships are so different that using the word "marriage" to apply to both would obscure a fundamental distinction in nature. As Maggie Gallagher puts it, "Politicians can pass a bill saying a chicken is a duck and that doesn't make it true. Truth matters."

Note that the objection is not that using terms this way would have bad consequences-confusing the butcher, for example-but that it would fail to divide up the world correctly. Even if nobody noticed or cared, such usage would blur a real boundary in nature.

The problem (as I argued previously) is that marriage is a human institution, the boundaries of which are drawn and redrawn for human purposes.

3. The "Bad Consequences" Version:

But what if such redrawing had bad consequences? This, I think, is the real concern driving the definitional arguments. Gallagher, for example, thinks that defining "marriage" to include gays and lesbians would ultimately erode the institution.

David Blankenhorn has similar concerns. Indeed, his own version of the argument makes the consequentialist undercurrent apparent: instead of square circles or duck-chickens, Blankenhorn asks us to imagine what would happen if the word "ballet" were used to refer to all forms of dance.

Of course redefining "ballet" that way would be bad. But that's because doing so would frustrate human aims. If you go to the theater to see ballet and end up getting Riverdance instead, you'll likely be upset or disappointed.

Would extending marriage to gays and lesbians frustrate human aims in a similar way? Marriage-equality opponents like Blankenhorn and Gallagher certainly think so. Specifically, they think it would sever marriage from its core function of binding children to their mothers and fathers.

But now it seems that the definitional point is no longer doing any argumentative work. The real objection here is that same-sex marriage harms society. If that's the objection, let's focus on it directly.

4. The Constitutional-Law Version:

There is, however, a fourth version of the definitional argument, one specifically related to the constitutional debate.

Legal advocates for marriage equality-such as Ted Olson and David Boies, who are challenging California's Prop. 8-often argue that gays and lesbians deserve the freedom to marry because of the Fourteenth Amendment's equal-protection and due-process guarantees. But if same-sex marriage involves CHANGING the definition of marriage, opponents contend, the Fourteenth-Amendment argument falters.

According to this version of the definitional argument, gays and lesbians are not being denied equal access to an existing institution, they are asking for an existing institution to be redefined. There may well be good reasons for redefining it. But that is a matter for legislatures to decide, not courts.

This version is more subtle than the others, and addressing it fully requires more space than I have here. But my quick response would be that marriage case law over the last four decades suggests that male-female isn't a defining element in the way this argument requires.

Consider for example Griswold v. Connecticut (1965), which affirmed the right of married couples to purchase contraceptives, and Turner v. Safley (1987), which affirmed the right of prisoners to marry. Marriage is defined by its core purposes, and those purposes do not necessarily require (actual or potential) procreation.

The fact is that same-sex couples fall in love and commit their lives to each other for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, until death do they part.

And if it looks like a duck and walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, then legally speaking it ought to be treated like a duck.

A Breakthrough Argument on DADT

On CNN's "State of the Union," National Security Adviser (and retired four-star general) James L. Jones argues puts a powerful frame around repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell:

I have served my country in uniform since 1967, and in that period, we covered racial questions, racial integration. We've covered the integration of women in the armed forces. People suggested that that would be a national security problem if we did both of those things. It turned out to be, as a matter of fact, a force multiplier by doing those things. People - and I grew up in a generation where they said if you integrate members of the gay community, that will be a national security problem. That will probably prove itself to be false as well.

Proponents of DADT are down to arguing, in effect: Why mess with a policy that works in time of war? As Daniel Pipes puts it, "Now is not the time for social experimentation in the armed forces." Jones has the answer: integration is not a distraction, it is a force multiplier. With those two words, "force multipler," the general has given pro-repeal forces a rallying cry. Let's shout it from the rooftops.

‘The Homosexuals’ — Timely Again

It's easy to find fault with "The Homosexuals," a 1967 documentary from CBS, the first ever aired on a major network about "the problem" of homosexuality. Dave White at The Advocate, rediscovered the relic, and provides a litany of its sins. For example, it focuses exclusively on gay men, and has not a word to say about how lesbians (who, one assumes, are also homosexual) might be different. Amazing how that focus on gay men to the exclusion of lesbians plagues our discussion even now.

That may be because lesbians don't fit so comforably into the stereotype of relentless, anonymous sex that is the documentary's framework. Mike Wallace's sometimes squalid questions and lascivious tone appear presumptuous and patronizing today, if you can't give yourself a little distance and appreciate its camp value:

The average homosexual, if there be such, is promiscuous. He is not interested in, nor capable of a lasting relationship like that of a heterosexual marriage. His sex life, his "love" life, consists of a series of chance encounters at the clubs and bars he inhabits, and even on the streets of the city, the pick up, the one night stand, these are characteristic of the homosexual relationship.

It's impossible to do justice to his spin on the word "love;" you have to hear it for yourself (this passage is about the 8:20 mark) to appreciate how near to contempt he finds the very thought.

And that age's experts on homosexuality are given almost total deference in the piece. Charles Socarides pronounces, to a classroom of curious students (including us) the conventional notion of the time that homosexuality is a mental illness. But he then goes further in responding to a student question about "happy homosexuals," by scoffing; they don't and can't exist. Question answered. Next?

That's why it might be hard to appreciate how groundbreaking this documentary really was. No one who missed the 1950s and 60s can imagine how much sheer effort it took, then, for the nascent gay rights movement to be heard or taken seriously. Mention of the word "homosexual" on commercial television in a neutral way was almost inconceivable. An hour-long slot on the subject -- even with condescension, misinformation and insults -- was a bonanza.

We simply have no conception, today, of how dominant -- and successful -- the closet was in virtually shutting down any public conversation at all in which gay men are viewed as citizens rather than predators. Yet the documentary opens with a gay man who is well adjusted even by the standards of our own time. There are also interviews with a judge (from North Carolina!) and a prosecutor who are going through the first stages of questioning social conventions about homosexuality. And, of course, any journalism from those days that includes an interview with Frank Kameny won't make it easy to leave unchallenged the notion which took for granted our (in Dean Rusk's candid phrase) "personal instability." (Kameny and Rusk make their points starting at the 29 minute mark.)

The toxins that still infect our debate today are closer to the surface here. And chief among them is the human distortion that Jonathan Rauch, Bruce Bawer and Andrew Sullivan have all tried so valiantly to have heterosexuals of good will envision: What would life be like if you grew up believing that love would have no role in your future? How would that affect a human being's ordinary development and moral thinking?

I can't imagine any way to make that point better than Mike Wallace's discrediting of the word "love" for gay men. He honestly felt, as virtually everyone else at the time did, that gay men were "not interested in, nor capable of, a lasting relationship like that of heterosexual marriage." In fact, the documentary ends with a (heterosexually) married homosexual saying that he doesn't believe he could have a "love relationship" with another man. His moral imagination was formed, along with the rest of the culture, around the notion that homosexuality involves no emotions, no affection, no relationship to others except the physical.

Wallace has since regretted the documentary's tone, as well as the prejudices of the time. But he has no reason to regret having participated in helping this nation begin an open discussion about homosexuality.

Forty-three years later, this documentary is timely again. Heterosexuals today don't have to imagine the moral deformity that was demanded of gay men by assuming they had no need for love. "The Homosexuals" shows exactly what that looks like. When we fight for legal recognition of our relationships, it is because of this sabotage of our souls. I am grateful we have it today to help make our case.

The Spiral of Progress

We rounded the corner and were met by an 8-year-old girl with her hand outstretched in greeting.

"How are you?" she asked. Her long ponytails jittered with energy. "My name is Selena. Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," we said.

"What is progress?"

We were at the Tino Sehgal exhibit at the Guggenheim Museum in New York. All we knew in advance was that the exhibit was interactive and took over the entire rotunda. We didn't expect that the piece would wind up being a serious conversation with several different people on the same theme.

Selena started walking up the ramp that circles the entire inside of the museum and we walked with her. I looked at my partner Jenny and her friend Lori and said slowly, "Progress is when you take steps toward a goal."

"Can you give me an example of progress?"

"Gay marriage advancing from state to state."

"OK," she said. An older teenager, Jane, was waiting for us farther up the ramp, half hidden behind a pole. Selena summarized our conversation for her and vanished.

We walked alongside Jane, climbing the slope of the circular rotunda, ascending higher and higher with each word.

She asked us again about progress and when I again responded with gay marriage, she gave her own example of progress: the weekend before, she had been out with a group of friends. They were mixed gay and straight, and no one had really noticed. To them, the difference was insignificant.

We talked about what social progress means, and how we can tell if it has been achieved.

The conversation continued to get deeper as we climbed higher.

With the next interpreter, a man in his 20s, we talked about where progress came from. "Consensus," said Lori.

"And where does consensus come from?" he asked.

"Listening," Lori said. Our final interpreter was Michael, an older man who told us a story. He had recently been to a play with his wife, he said. The play compared gay life in the 50s with gay life today. What did we think, he asked us. Have gays and lesbians made progress?

"Absolutely," I said. "In my lifetime you can see that."

With each interpreter, our conversation became a slightly different take on broader social progress, but those conversations themselves were a sign of progress, too. It is impossible for me to imagine that 50 years ago - or even 20 years ago - a similar conversation could have been had with an 8-year-old, an 18-year-old, a 25-year-old and a senior citizen.

Yet here was a random collection of New Yorkers who each believed that gay marriage is progress and weren't afraid to say so to (very straight looking) strangers.

I've been thinking of those conversations ever since.

When we think of the progress we've made on gay rights, we tend to limit our definition to whatever big state or national battle is currently in the news. Did a state legislature vote for gay marriage? We crow about progress. Did voters take that right back again? We mourn our country's backslide into homophobic intolerance.

But the truth is that those big battles aren't making progress - they're reflecting it. Progress comes slowly, person by person, step by step, in conversations like the ones we were having in the Guggenheim's rotunda.

Progress comes when we listen to those who have doubts about gay rights and when they listen to us about how it hurts us to be denied what straight people take for granted.

Progress comes when we tell our own truths to our families, our friends, our colleagues, our clients. Progress comes when, through conversation, people stop seeing us as a thing to be feared and start hearing our stories and empathizing with them.

When we do win those big battles, it is partly because of strategy - but it is mostly because of stories. It is only after we win hearts that we win votes.

At the top of the rotunda, Michael shook our hands. "This is a work by Tino Seghal," he said. "It's called, 'This Progress."

And it was.

My Bias Against Bias

Just a quick (and what I think is obvious) word on the fact that the judge presiding over the Prop. 8 trial is gay: It was inevitable that he would have some sexual orientation, and there really aren't that many options.

The fact that he has a sexual orientation -- a homosexual one, as it turns out -- doesn't make Judge Vaughan Walker any more biased toward what some might view as his team's side than an opposite sexual orientation would in favor of the majority. Unless, of course, you go in for the notion that nobody is ever not biased by their sexual orientation -- which is, itself, a bias.

A rather potent bit of evidence suggests that Judge Walker has the ability to separate his sexual orientation from his legal work. When he was nominated to the bench (first, unsuccessfuly, by Ronald Reagan, then by George H.W. Bush), his biggest obstacle was opposition from the gay community because he had represented the U.S. Olympics in a trademark suit against the Gay Olympics. This caused gay activists no end of dyspepsia.

Both heterosexual and homosexual judges all have an identical obligation to be fair and impartial, and to be fully accountable. If Judge Walker does exhibit bias, that alone is enough for a reviewing court to disqualify him . No one defending Prop. 8 has even filed such a motion, to my knowledge, and if they have they certainly haven't convinced any higher court of the merits.

Of course non-participants like NOM and Ed Whelan, the Excitable Boy over at NRO, can get as rhetorically exercised as they wish. But anything Judge Walker does will be reviewed by at least three judges in the Court of Appeal, possibly another 11 or so there, and then nine more above them. To my knowledge, none of these potential reviewers is him or herself openly homosexual. But even if one or two has slipped through, the homosexuals will - as arithmetic demands - be vastly outnumbered.

That would leave bias unconnected to sexual orienation -- as it should be.

Brian Brown’s Bad Logic

Brian Brown throws around the term "irrational" quite a bit.

Brown is the Executive Director of the National Organization for Marriage (NOM), an anti-gay-marriage organization (Maggie Gallagher is its president). I first came across his name last summer when the Washington Post profiled him, describing him as "pleasantly, ruthlessly sane" and "rational."

From the profile, it appears that "irrational" is Brown's favorite term of abuse.

For example, he claims it's irrational when polls indicate that most young people support equal marriage rights for gays and lesbians. Or when people argue that marriage equality is ultimately inevitable. Or when they describe his position as bigotry:

"I think it's irrational that up until 10 years ago, all of these societies agreed with my position [and yet now they're changing]" he tells the Post.

However, the term "irrational" was given new meaning in Brown's most recent fundraising letter, in which he uses a new Department of Health and Human Services study, the "Fourth National Incidence Study of Child Abuse and Neglect (NIS-4)," to argue against same-sex marriage.

Brown cites the HHS study as stating that

"Children living with two married biological parents had the lowest rate of overall Harm Standard maltreatment, at 6.8 per 1,000 children. This rate differs significantly from the rates for all other family structure and living arrangement circumstances."

Brown goes on to argue,

"All parents working hard to raise good kids…deserve our respect and help. But there is no call to wipe out the ideal itself, rooted in Nature and Nature's God, and replace it with a man-made fantasy that same-sex unions are just the same as the one kind of union that best protects children."

Got that? Children do best with a married biological mother and father. Therefore, we ought to oppose same-sex marriage.

I felt like I was missing some steps-maybe I was being "irrational"-so I went and read the study Brown cites. And I learned a few interesting things.

First, the 455-page study says not a word about gay and lesbian parents. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Which makes it essentially useless for anyone wanting to do a three-way comparison between children of married straight parents, married gay parents, and unmarried gay parents.

The study does indeed find that, on average, children living with married biological parents are at substantially lower risk of maltreatment than children in other family structures studied: namely, those with "other married parents" (not both biological but both having a legal relationship to the child), unmarried parents (biological or other), single parents with an unmarried partner, unpartnered single parents, and no parents.

What follows from this finding is quite simple. My fellow gays and lesbians should stop snatching children away from married biological parents who are raising them. As The Gay Moralist, I hereby call for an immediate cessation of this horrible practice. It's bad for the kids. Stop it. Thank you.

Back on Planet Earth, where gay and lesbian people are generally not kidnapping children from their married biological parents, the relevant conclusion is rather different.

To the extent that the study teaches us about gay and lesbian families at all, it is to suggest that children in them would do far better IF THEIR PARENTS COULD GET MARRIED.

Are you listening, Mr. Rational? The study actually shows the OPPOSITE of what you're using it for.

But wait-there's more. Everything I've said thus far (and indeed, everything in the HHS report) assumes an "all else being equal" clause. But of course, all else is often not equal.

Which is why the report looks at factors beyond family structure, and notes that, for example

• Children of the unemployed are at a 2-3 times higher risk for maltreatment.

• Children in large households (four or more children) had more than twice the incidence of maltreatment than those in two-child families.

• Children in families of low socio-economic status were 5 times more likely to be victims of maltreatment than other children.

Somehow, however, I don't expect Brown to oppose marriage for the poor, or for his fellow conservative Catholics (who tend to have large families).

Or maybe to ask wealthy lesbians (Ellen and Portia?) to revive that imaginary kidnapping trend.

The general problem here is familiar: making the best the enemy of the good. Brown's argument presupposes that the only people who should be allowed to marry are those whose marriages would create ideal scenarios for children.

By that logic, NOM's own president wouldn't have been allowed her current marriage, since that marriage created a stepfamily. Logician, heal thyself.

Meanwhile, there are several million American children being raised by gay parents. What (if anything) can the HHS study tell us about them?

According to the study, children living with "other married parents" (at least one non-biological) are at LESS THAN HALF the risk of maltreatment compared to children living with a single parent and an unmarried partner.

So if we really care about these children's welfare, we should let their parents marry. It's only rational.