I haven't been following much of the continuing debate over Elena Kagan, which seems (mercifully) to be petering out. It'll come back to life when her hearings begin, but if we're lucky, the worst is over.
Still, I have to get two final points on the record. First, the rumors about her sexual orientation demonstrate one thing above all else: how utterly reliant the speculation is on stereotypes. Softball. Cigars. Haircut. Build. Yes, some women who look and act like Elena Kagan are lesbians. And some women aren't. We should all be very proud of our keen senses of intuition in so definitively being able to sort out, in public, this most personal of matters.
The biggest factor in the speculation, though, is that Kagan is single. Or, as Maureen Dowd astutely notes this morning, less flatteringly "unmarried." I confess I was a little miffed that her editors stole the headline I'd planned to use, "All the Single Ladies," but the point is rich enough to warrant a bit of elaboration.
The debate over Kagan's sexual orientation may say more about the importance of marriage in our culture than homosexuality. This foolish skirmish is exactly what drives closeted lesbians and gay men into sham marriages with someone of the opposite sex -- and is exactly why heterosexuals have such a direct and personal interest in ridding the culture of homophobia, including the internalized kind that fuels the closet. As long as marriage is viewed as a marker - in fact the marker - for heterosexuality, lesbians and gay men who are ashamed or even just nervous about being homosexual will have an incentive to marry defensively. Whatever the many social advantages of marriage, it is ultimately between two individuals, and the cultural interference of homophobia has taken an enormous toll on far too many of those personal relationships.
More to the point, even heterosexuals who are cognizant of anti-gay sentiment in their environment will feel the pressure to marry, whether they want to or are inclined to, or not. Maybe Elena Kagan has been unfortunate in love. Or maybe she doesn't want to get married, or feel the need to. Yet the spectacle of this debate over her sexual orientation must be at least an embarrassment for her, if not a full measure of sheer emotional torture.
And all because she is not married.
In an ideal world without homophobia, we might have been able to have a discussion about the importance of marriage and the equal importance of individual liberty in making that choice. But we don't live in that world, and Elena Kagan has had to suffer the needless indignity of our salacious speculations about a subject that is alluring to us, but about which we know absolutely nothing.