Apple CEO Tim Cook acknowledged publicly he is gay for the first time. It’s a sign of the increasing acceptance of gay people—linked to the advancement of the freedom to marry, which has helped “mainstream” being gay for many people. Also, in the age of social media, nothing really can remain private, can it.
More. Arch social conservative Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Tex) said this about Tim Cook’s coming out as gay: “Those are his personal choices. I’ll tell you, I love my iPhone.”
Does he want to marry his iPhone?
14 Comments for “Tim Cook’s Not-So-Surprising Announcement”
posted by Don on
I like that Cook spoke directly to his home state of Alabama and challenged them to make “equal means equal” a reality there. It is antithetical to the way the whole state operates (the deep south is one giant “Mean Girls” high school melodrama where in/out group dynamics have reached epic proportions), but he has said the unspeakable there. And he’s done it from a very high place.
Forcing people to address issues that “are just not talked about” is primarily how change will occur in the deep south. And I think Cook’s “finally” addressing his orientation goes further than it would in a liberal enclave. In places like Alabama, no one challenges the status quo. And if they try, they are almost never given a podium of honor.
Cook just did both.
posted by Tom Scharbach on
It is antithetical to the way the whole state operates (the deep south is one giant “Mean Girls” high school melodrama where in/out group dynamics have reached epic proportions), but he has said the unspeakable there. And he’s done it from a very high place.
The point was well illustrated by this note from Reuters:
We just don’t talk about such things among decent people, honey, and that’s a fact.
It is very interesting to have you and the others who live in the South talk about the culture vis a vis gays and lesbians. It is sometimes an eye-opener for folks like me, because it is a foreign culture to most of us living outside it.
posted by Houndentenor on
I assume that the mayor never discusses his wife and family? I didn’t think so. In fact heterosexuals usually put their families on display to promote their businesses or political careers but when gay people do it they’ve overstepped somehow. Is it possible for people like this to hear the obvious bigotry in their comments?
posted by Tom Scharbach on
I don’t think that most straight people are aware that they send out a hundred “I’m straight …” signals a day. It isn’t even noticed in our culture.
posted by Tom Scharbach on
Good on Tim. Every time a gay or lesbian, from janitor to CEO, famous or known only to a few, comes 100% out of the closet and lives openly for all to see, a kid, somewhere, oppressed by social conservative parents, community and church lying through their teeth about gays and lesbians, is given hope.
As Harvey Milk put it:
Milk was right, Dead right. I would go a step further, though, and urge the people who can safely do so to go beyond family, friends, co-workers and neighbors, that is, to come out in public to all and sundry, as Tim did. I made that choice in 2006, when I was invited to become a regional “face” of the effort to defeat Wisconsin’s anti-marriage amendment, and again when I accepted responsibility for leading the DPW LGBT Caucus in 2009.
I’ve never made a better decision in my life than to move past my fear, accept those roles, and live flat out wide in the open, in a small, rural community in Wisconsin. Free at last.
And, as Don (who has, I suspect, had a similar trajectory as a result of the marriage equality case in which he is a named plaintiff) points out, being out where “do what you want, but don’t scare the horses” is the watchword, challenges the status quo and forces folks to think.
posted by Don on
Tom’s right. I’ve come out in a number of ways and pretty much have been out basically forever. What it did for my small community in deep-red north Florida was force them to confront conflicting ideas. They knew and liked me, respected my family (father was town judge) and I had an impeccable reputation growing up there. Contrast that with the child molester who is going to hell and basically all they can come up with is a really bad case of cognitive dissonance.
That was what Milk was advocating. And that’s what Cook did when he spoke in Alabama recently. To be recognized as an outstanding talent from the state AND be the demon they tell each other we are makes people uncomfortable. And they should be VERY uncomfortable with their ideas.
At one time, it was considered comfortable to not oppose lynching. Few people joined in, but a solid majority tacitly let the practice flourish.
We’re seeing the same thing happen with us. And most recently Sen. Ted Cruz’s crazy call for BOTH a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage AND a call to leave the decision up to the states. Because Jeebus and Constitooshun.
Their positions are untenable. And until they are repeatedly called on the carpet to explain themselves, it will continue. It only worked as long as we agreed to remain second class citizens. Now, as this blog points out, the front has moved to the conservative side of the debate where they are being asked to explain how using government to enforce religious beliefs is smaller government.
We have to keep asking that question. Because there is no answer.
And no, placating social conservatives is not going to work. It’s like covering up for an alcoholic – they won’t change until they are confronted with the harm they do.
posted by Tom Scharbach on
And most recently Sen. Ted Cruz’s crazy call for BOTH a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage AND a call to leave the decision up to the states. Because Jeebus and Constitooshun.
Ah, good Ted, bad Ted. Strange bedfellows, Ted is.
Barney Frank made an interesting observation on Ted’s better half yesterday, after Ted spoke on CNBC::
Barney was having his fun, of course, and his comments are not to be taken seriously, since Ted’s worser half wants to pull a George Bush and ban marriage equality nationally.
posted by Don on
Fun or no, Barney has made a great point. Although I think Ted is very smart. I think he’s moving the ball intentionally on this issue. Calling for a constitutional amendment to “ban this abomination” as they like to say is the equivalent of sending it to a committee for “further study.”
Ain’t goin’ nowhere, Jack. And that’s the brilliance of the argument. Still shouting “Segregation today . . .” on the courthouse steps while knowing you are going to lose. Pull those dollars out of the rubes pockets while you can, Ted.
posted by Clayton on
I’ve lived most of my adult life in a Southern community of less than 20,000 people, and I’ve done it as an out-of-the-closet gay man. My husband and I are (normally) accorded a basic level of civility and respect. While we occasionally encounter blatant homophobes, we are more usually treated well, and most of our close friends are straight. I’m a teacher, and I’m out at the workplace, and I flatter myself by thinking that I’ve been a positive role model for students for the last 20 years or so. Yes, in some ways life would have been easier if my husband and I had made a choice to live in a “gay ghetto” like San Francisco, New York, New Orleans, or West Hollywood, but in some ways, what we’ve done has been much more positive and much more subversive. So kudos to Tim Cook, who not only confronted his home state’s bigotry, but who more or less cornered his small town mayor into revealing himself to be a hypocritical jerk. Cook has done us all a great favor.
posted by Jorge on
I don’t like how it seems as if he was forced to acknowledge in a public way. The idea that people are happy he acknowledges he is gay publicly makes a private reticence seem shameful in comparison.
In his column, the Apple (AAPL, Tech30) chief said that he had tried to maintain “a basic level of privacy.” But he said he decided that desire for privacy was stopping him from working for the benefit of others.
“I don’t consider myself an activist, but I realize how much I’ve benefited from the sacrifice of others,” he said. “So if hearing that the CEO of Apple is gay can help someone struggling to come to terms with who he or she is, or bring comfort to anyone who feels alone, or inspire people to insist on their equality, then it’s worth the trade-off with my own privacy.”
But I can respect that, too.
posted by Tom Scharbach on
I don’t like how it seems as if he was forced to acknowledge in a public way.
Well, then point out that Cook was not forced, that he chose to come out in public to achieve a goal, to give up his privacy for what he considered a worthwhile and important end result.
Many thousands of gays and lesbians over the years have made that choice.
None of us were forced to do so, except by the dictates of our conscience. We were given the opportunity to do some good by coming out in public, good that we could not do by maintaining our privacy, and we chose to come out in public. It really is that simple.
The idea that people are happy he acknowledges he is gay publicly makes a private reticence seem shameful in comparison.
I guess that depends on the circumstances, doesn’t it? Nothing is wrong with a desire to keep our privacy, but we are all faced with the “coming out” decision frequently, as you well know, in ways large and small, and have to weigh the consequences of coming out in a particular circumstance. We know when we have missed the mark in that respect, when we have hidden out when we should have come out. We know when we have acted shamefully, and when we have not. The coming out decision is never “one size fits all”.
Cook chose to go public, as many of us have done over the years. That doesn’t shame anyone who prefers to protect their privacy, often for the best of reasons.
Let me put it this way: I believe that it is important for gays and lesbians to come out to family, friends, co-workers and neighbors. I think that it is important to be as “out” in public as it is safe for each of us, individually, to be. But I recognize that “coming out” is risky for many gays and lesbians — it shouldn’t be, but it is, still, in many circumstances — and I don’t think that being sensible about running risks is shameful. I think that it is prudent.
I also respect the desire to maintain a “zone of privacy”. I have areas of my life that I keep private, for good and sufficient reason. But in my case, my sexual orientation is no longer within the “zone of privacy”. I could not keep that private and do what I was challenged to do in 2006 and 2009, so I didn’t.
Cook apparently made the same choice. Good for him, and I hope that his public coming out will make a difference.
posted by Jorge on
None of us were forced to do so, except by the dictates of our conscience.
I realize I overreached a bit, Tom. You’re also going a little too far if you’re going to suggest there wasn’t any outside pressure for him and other people whose homosexuality is almost an open secret to make a public coming out speech. The pressures aren’t all to be private. The dictates of conscience can upon careful reflection lead one to go along with the crowd or go against the crowd. Or even, both at once.
I guess that depends on the circumstances, doesn’t it?…
This is all very well said.
posted by Tom Jefferson 3rd on
It was something of an ‘open secret’ within much of the nerd-geek-apple world. No big surprise.
It is important that he came out in a dignified and (socially) important manner.
posted by Don on
A friend said “did you hear the CEO of Apple just came out?”
I replied “yeah, this is the biggest announcement since Ellen DeGeneres and Nathan Lane.”
The only ones who were shocked were the ones that had been paying no attention. Still, important that he came out. It’s a first. And firsts are always important. Most importantly because not officially coming out directly implies it is a bad thing.