In a fallen world, even the best ideas are susceptible to corruption. One example is how the “It Gets Better” campaign has degenerated into political posturing. As Sean Cutter writes in the Washington Blade, the series of YouTube videos originally conveyed stories of inspiration to bullied gay kids. But like most everything else, it has become politicized and now we have a endless stream of politicians who know nothing about the experience of distraught gay youth trotted out to score political points. As Cutter writes:
Congressman Jim Moran’s video is uncomfortable to watch because, having no experience to relate to troubled gay teens with, he resorts to talking about how he was a “shy kid” growing up. He looks like he doesn’t know what else to say, and how could he? He never grew up with the broad, institutional persecution that LGBT youth face. But with so many other politicians making similar videos, his office must have felt that it needed to make its own.
Even worse,
Rep. Leonard Lance, who appears in the video, voted against repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” Rep. Frank LoBiondo, who says in the video, “There are actions we can take to make things better now,” voted against repeal of DADT and for the Marriage Protection Act, which would prohibit federal courts from hearing cases that involve challenges to the Defense of Marriage Act.
Which may put into perspective the decision by Sen. Scott Brown (who voted for “Don’t Ask” repeal) to forgo making a video despite howls of protest from certain partisan corners.
10 Comments for “Good Idea Goes Bad”
posted by Houndentenor on
If Brown doesn’t want to make a video, then he shouldn’t. That’s not a criticism. The videos from pop singers and politicians are not the best ones anyway. Far more moving are the real stories from people who lived through the experience these young people are experiencing now. I’m not interested in whether or not media whores (including politicians) are jumping onto the latest cause du jour, and I don’t think most people are either. Someone is always going to say something tacky about someone and the internet has made it easier to quote them. That doesn’t mean those opinions are typical of the public.
posted by Tom Scharbach on
The idea — having gays and lesbians who have “been there” share their experience, strength and hope with young gays and lesbians who are feeling isolated and discouraged in the hope of stopping teen suicide — hasn’t “gone bad”.
I’ve not watched a lot of the videos — a couple dozen at best — but if my sampling reflects the whole, many of the videos are moving testaments to hope. Gay and lesbian kids should hear those messages.
The encouragement of straights is a good thing, even though they haven’t “been there”. Gay and lesbian kids need to messages of encouragement from straight people, too. And straights need to hear that the incessant drumbeat from the religious right isn’t shared by everyone, or even most, straights.
I looked at the NJ video because of this post. I disagree with both Cutter quotes cited.
Moran has been an consistent ally over the years, going back to the days before DOMA. Moran’s video is unscripted, and rough around the edges, but it comes (to my mind, anyway) from the heart. It doesn’t hurt.
As to Lance and LaBiondo (and other conservatives who may vote up and down the line against equality), I don’t share Cutter’s apparently outrage. Nobody in their right mind can think that the disproportionate rate of suicide among gay and lesbian teens is a good thing, and the issue isn’t ideological. We all need to be doing what we can, and I’d like to see more conservatives speaking out.
I don’t know what has gotten into Sean Cutter. He demands ideological purity when it comes to encouraging gay and lesbian kids to stick it out and live long enough to build their lives? That’s just wrong.
posted by Hortensio on
I have to side with Mr. Scharbach on this one. You might be able to reasonably argue that politicians are being tacky in making these videos, but I’m not sure where Cutter’s coming from on this. I would expect we’d’ve been happier growing up if we’d known that conservatives weren’t out to get us at every opportunity. I know I would have been happier, at any rate.
My own view is that it’s very much a good thing that conservative politicians in Canada and the U.S. are making these videos. I’m certainly not going to start getting angry at them when they’re only trying to help.
posted by Jorge on
I’m not too keen on calling people who do pro-gay things and vote against gay’s political goals hypocrites. Big surprise, huh?
Since we’re now going around trying to keep people boxed into the narrow little demon packages we’ve compartamentalized them into, I have some choice things to say about Dan Savage.
He’s famous, so I’m sure it’s been said already.
posted by Lymis on
I don’t think that the characterization of the It Gets Better Project as having “started” as people speaking from the heart and “gotten politicized” is accurate, as though it was some ground-roots shoestring budget program that got trendy and moved uptown and glitzy and prostituted its original mission.
What’s true is that the media, including the gay media, has focused on the celebrity postings, and the media echo chamber has politicized those celebrity videos.
But the vast majority of the posts have been and continue to be “just regular people” telling their stories – and the focus is and really remains the kids trapped in their homes in isolation.
Yes, it’s important to us, as adults who are out on our own, to hold politicians accountable, and to question just what the hell someone who says “it gets better” and then votes to keep us unequal is trying to say.
But at the same time, you know what? Even with DADT and DOMA on the books, even before Lawrence decriminalized sodomy nationwide, even before what gains we’ve made on employment and other issues, it did get better as I got older.
If we are talking to teens who are wondering whether to commit suicide because God hates them, nobody will ever love them, their deepest feelings are disgusting, and they can never change any of it, then they need to know that it can get better – and that’s independent of the state of the laws.
Yes, it absolutely sucks that people are still voting against our equality. But we can still move out of small towns, find friends, make deep and lasting relationships, and find love and family – no matter what the assholes do to us legally.
So LoBiondo is an asshole, and this amounts to pandering and posturing – but that doesn’t make the message wrong. Even if we NEVER get legal marriage equality, life gets better than it was when we were alone and suicidal in some small town somewhere surrounded by bigots.
And let’s not lose sight of the fact that even if you are right, then conservative politicians are finding it politically expedient to post pro-gay messages promising that things will get better. That alone is progress.
posted by Regan DuCasse on
I wasn’t eager to jump on the bandwagon if making a video because I wasn’t sure what I could offer. Even though for the most part the reason why I AM so empathetic to gay kids is because I’m a black female. There are vestiges of racial prejudice or misogyny that affect the quality of my life, but that doesn’t mean I know anything about BEING gay. Indeed, I’ve said that precisely at every opportunity. When I am asked why I’m not just a friend, or someone that loves someone that’s gay, but a street warrior for rights and equality, it’s literally something I learned during the Civil Rights Movement and the members of my family who got involved back then.
Learned early. That’s all.
I find mentoring gay kids a very satisfying, hands on way of them knowing who I am and what I do.
I did experience supporting teens online though Judy Shepard’s site that honored her son called “Matthew’s Place”. And that was one of the best experiences of my life.
It has reverberated through generations and hopefully it won’t be long now before all the pieces of equality fall into place.
That’s all I can impart is for a kid to find an advocate and ally. And I learned, that once they found that ONE adult that understands, supports, empathizes, counsels and loves…the young folks will FLOCK to that person in no time.
And if it takes ONE who can make a difference too many, things sure will get better.
posted by spaniel on
I don’t know that it’s fair to say a good idea has gone bad just because a few politicians have made awkward, ham-handed videos. If anything, I see this as a positive sign that some people are realizing that stark silence is not much better than open homophobia. Those political videos are a small fraction of the large total. Kids still have access to sincere and affirming messages. The IGB project remains a positive idea. I just wish a similar project existed when I was in high school nearly 40 years ago.
posted by Tom Scharbach on
Along these lines, there is an article in the Advocate about the coming out stories of openly gay representatives in Congress.
Next year, Tammy Baldwin may be the first openly gay senator.
posted by Tom Scharbach on
Here’s the link to the Advocate article.
posted by Jorge on
Looks like those four don’t want people to think the project’s jumped the shark.
Never mind. The video was posted on Youtube on November 4th.
Yes, but the Washington Blade column was written on the 2nd. Remember, sound travels faster than light in Washington.